Old Crush – First Love

I know first love is real and romantic, I know also that it is indeed hard to forget. I think it is what most people called puppy love, an innocent one. It is so immature, but I would never forget that time. You might think and ask yourself right now, why I am reading this? You are reading this letter because somehow you are my first love. Not sure if you knew that, but I guess you knew now.

Lucas, I cannot imagine myself without you all those years. You had been my very best friend although it does not end forever I still had a great memory of the two of us together. I like being your childhood friend, not only because you share most of your food, but you do care for me. I know that this kind of situation might happen, though I did not expect it to be like this, but I miss you.

Blue skies as we ran down the street, chase one another, and stumble upon the grass on the field. It was a wonderful day, a magical one. The feeling of being the person who plays in a romance movie and ending up in a happily ever after, that was what I thought was going to be. Your kind, gentle, and funny; you made me smile for no reason and I like playing with your gorgeous hair.

I remember the time that you and Shelby your dog –was the only present on my birthday. I invited many kids that I know to our school and I do not know why they did not show up. I felt empty on what was supposed to be my special day, but you treat me like a princess saying that now we can eat all of this food. You make me smile in an uncertain situation, thank you for being there with me.

You are my seatmate at kindergarten, no one can separate us even Miss Johnson. We always laugh at Jessica every time she sneezes, our teacher tells us that that is not nice, but we still laugh anyway. I also remember what we did on Miss Smith’s table; I hope you still remember that. You are my best bud, you like things that I like and you support everything that I come up with.

The breeze is cold so you use to sit by my side. I felt warmth and happy being with you all the time. We go together on our first day in elementary; we sit beside each other and swore that we never leave one another. You gave me a bracelet that you made using those dry leaves, and I gave you mine that I made using dried flowers. It is delicate that is why we promise to keep it and take care of it.

My mother sang me lullaby every night, but thinking of you is what made me go to sleep so that I can dream. Whenever I think of you, it is always a wonderful dream. I like to dream about what we are going to do when we grow up. Places that I planned we need to visit; I all wrote it down on my red notebook. By the way, I also knew what I want on our wedding day; I promise you would love it.

I picture our venue to be in a great valley, where we see the beautiful landscape with both of our family and friends together. I know it would only happen once and that is why it has to be special. I want our wedding to be filled with smiles and joy as we take this big step together. It does not have to be perfect for you and I are already perfect; I just want this moment to be for us.

Second grade, third grade, and so on- and we still inseparable. You do, I will do; you go, I will too. We both do anything together. I always tell myself how lucky I am to be with someone I like. You like things that I like and you deeply show how interested you are, and by that thank you so much. You care too much and I love it because I feel like I am a princess and you are my king.

I chase you somewhere, but I cannot see you anywhere. My eyes wander, looking for you above and under. Finally, I saw your shadow, a grey yet full of life. You grab me from behind, hold and cuddle me very tight. I am too naïve; I think we’re both, but we knew it is real. We both too young to understand such things, yet we know that we both felt the same thing, or maybe it is just me.

High school, as I dream of it is a paradise. We always talk about it and are excited to be in there. You spend your summer on your grandma’s home. I am wondering and bored at that time, but I am much more thinking of what we are going to do when school finally starts. I walk past your house, I peak at the window and I cannot see anyone in there, so I just move on and headed to the school.

It is the first day and I cannot see your presence. My eyes look from side to side, every wall to the rooms and every hall to the lockers. I finally see you at the cafeteria, I almost shouts your name aloud and plan to chase you, but I see you headed to the boys. And that day is when we just stop our communication and I do not know why. We see each other but never talk to one another.

We made a pact that you forgot, but I completely understand that. I cannot depend more on our childhood memories for people change constantly. Your path is the opposite of mine. It is almost 5 months, you like football now and your good at it. I spend more time on science and crafts with my girls. I just want to talk and I do not know why, maybe I just miss the times being with you.

Christmas is almost near; never thought that I would be a stranger to you. You got your friends that are so very rowdy and I got mine who obsess on nail polish. I just want to say hi, I guess because it is such a long time that we talk or have been together. I hope that I would not made you unease because I like you, but rather think of it that as I miss you because you are my best friend.

                                                                                                                                                Your best friend truly


A Letter For You